SECURITY: CREDIT CARDS - All credit card information is transmitted via secure connection to a secure server with AuthorizeNet. We do not store any of your credit card information on our server. This means that your CC# is as secure as it can possibly be. Payments made with PayPal are carried out on the PayPal's servers, not ours. PayPal is a password-protected system. However, if for example your 14 year old gets on your computer and orders something from us using your credit card and you're steaming mad about it, then read our return/refund policy. We have no control over your 14 year old or your crazy roommates. Keep your password secret so that this doesn't happen to you. If you've decide you'd rather not transmit your personal information online, then you can pay with a money order or check. Use "money order" as your payment method during checkout. Checks must clear before your order is shipped. You can also place your order over the phone by calling the number listed on our Contact page. A friendly and polite customer service associate is anxiously waiting to assist you -- you better believe it!

PRIVACY: All customer's email addresses, names, phone numbers, weights, ages, sexual preferences, and favorite bands are never shared with anyone. If you receive a promotional email, post card, or gift from us (which is very rare because most of us are sociophobic), you can rest assured that it came ONLY from us and not a third party or the Russian Mafia. No one has approached us to buy our customer's information and if they did, we would personally tell them to go hump themselves. We also promise not to clutter up your (e)mail box with the joke-of-the day or advertisements for viagra. We all have personal email accounts too, so we know what it's like.